over the rainbow

Por: all-aroundme | |

over the rainbow
love spread all along
and the skies are blue
secretly hold it tight
don't try to let go
as i begin to cry...

i wish i could see
the flying sky in front of me
wind gonna blow to high
feel the heart
warm as i touch
and i'm free to choose~

get instinct to write those words...
so meaningless..yet it gets so high
i believe when i sing..i'm lonely tone and want some place to share my thoughts and feelings...

actually i create this page just to express myself when i'm down.
most likely these days seem a "down" day for me..
i got overly sensitive over something trivial...

my friend told me to wake her up nicely and in a slow tone..but i did backward..
all i did was a mess..i have no manner at all..all things that i do seems so wrong and so unforgivable..

and i'm feeling so low because of that..i hate the feeling of being inferior like this..but i can't keep it from jumping all around me like an idiot and all i get is griefness all day long..

it keeps get out of me whenever it wants...i'm afraid of being sensitive over something that i'm not suppose to feel...

but the good thing i guess it seems..it's a good thing for me...Allah has spoken..He knew that i always did bad things..and i always keep telling myself that i want to change for better..but in the end nothing progressive happens..stood still like the first place..

and this is the sign...sign for me to proof..to make a move...to change for better...to make my day more happier than those days..i would like to take those words into action..take those "aching words" buried it inside my heart and change it into reality...

seems so easy to say yet so hard to practice in the real world...
i see people tend to change but how long they are going to stay that way it depends...

i got something interesting from my friend yesterday..might want to share it here..so interesting..it might melt your heart though...

i'm going to write this in my mother tongue because when i did in english i'm going to lose the paces..and the main point won't reach your heart..i suppose..

the topic i simplified as "istiqomah"..it means doing something good continually in the proper manner as stated in syariat..oh wait i think using english might work..

my friend told a story before she start to get to the main point...this story is about a turtle and a rabbit..this story mainly involves between a creature with power and a slow turtle yet very determine in doing something that it believes..

the rabbit and the turtle went for a rally to determine who is the fastest and who can get to the end point first..the competition begins as rabbit started to race as fast as eye would barely detect figure's rabbit along the rally tract..but in the other hand, the poor turtle started it's pace as slow as our eyes would feel tired to count those steps that it makes..

but guess what in the end the turtle come out to be in victory...wonder why..
this story has been told from generation to generation..yet so many takes it slightly from the story...there's so many moral we can get...and that include me but until yesterday..i begin to like the turtle...its determination i mean..

even though it is so weak and its pace is so slow...so full of weaknesses..but it keeps fighting until the very end..and guess what it won the races and proved that even though we're not good enough as others..but we have to be determined in what ever we do even though logically it's so unwinnable but the history prove backward..

scholars said in order to maintain our good action continuosly..there's few guide that we should follow in order to "istiqomah" in what ever we do...
1.aware with the final destination
2.show our commitment
3.continuous effort
4.always check and review did we do that or not
5.self-accountability
6.blame ourselves if we're unable to do it the best
7.strive for improvement
8.lastly, humble towards Allah...this is the most important part among others..

i think that's all for now~